I don’t know why some of us have to carry what feels like more than one persons share of loss and grief. And fuck the ‘it builds strength or character’ trope. No one needs that much strength or character. It’s all just too fucking much.
All I know is I see you, friend. And you are beloved. 🤍
I know I should stop being surprised how you somehow make the hardest topics so humanly beautifully to read that I just want to crawl inside your words and never stop reading.
For over a decade you continually make me feel in awe of your way with words that come from such a tender, vulnerable, real place that I think we forget how lucky we are that we get to read them.
I have been in your life for all the moves. In fact, I don’t update your address in my contacts so I have most of the old addresses. It makes me so sad that you have to pack up and move again - and the way you packed the most precious pieces of your life made me cry.
But what really got me was to see myself on your list of favorites. I don’t know how I got so lucky to have that honorable place but somedays when I am so sad about the state of the world, I think about you and Julie and the pups, and I smile - and I think, “But they are my friends…and if I called them and said, ‘I’m coming!!! They would say, ‘Here is our address! We’ll send out a beacon because we know you have a little trouble with directions’” - and you’d be waiting with open arms. 🩵
That's precisely how it would happen, Rachel. We'd send a beacon so bright, you'd never get lost. Or I'd just drive your way and lead you. <3 And, of course, you're on my list of favorites. You've been there since Day One. The best people get elevated immediately, and you are simply The Best. XO, Me
I despise moving. And I quit therapy (after years) because it felt like ripping the scab off a wound again and again. I feel the ache in this. No one's spared, but like Kate said, I think some people feel it a lot deeper. I think you're one of those people. (I am, too.) And the fact that you have a joy plan for 2026 is amazing. It's hope. One little bit of happiness at a time. Wishing you all the good things... x
Ripping off the scab again and again -- I get that, Wendy. I feel like I KNOW what I need to do to move forward, but I just don't DO it. I'm going to refer to my 2026 plans as my "Joy Plan" from now on. Thank you for giving it a name. <3
I moved four times in the last year. I feel your pain, I also lost my mom last Thanksgiving. I did give myself that year to grieve, let the tears just flow as hard and fast as they want to come, every time they want to come. I’m now in a place where I think I can feel happy, as my place and surroundings matter so much to me. Fill your new place with everything that you love, including those special momento’s, make it a happy place. Wishing you comfort and peace in the new year.💕❤️
Yes, condolences on your mom also. Two of those moves were two weeks apart. I spent three nights in the new place and knew I had to get out, was in a hotel for a week while I Looked for a new place and started repacking AGAIN. All worth it to be where I am 🙏🏻💕
Encouraged to know you are breathing. Flooded with thoughts, untethered, sad and paralyzed. Sweet memories and a litany of missing. Reel it in to now, Breathe. Stretch. Pack. Stretch. Walk your dog. Write. Cry as needed. Eat food that serves your body instead well. Repeat.
We kind of skip the holidays. We try to celebrate them as a season, like a pagan seasonal celebration of the cold, the fire, the dark, the light. Because there is nothing sadder than an empty stocking. We are ok about 5 years after the death. We'll never be whole again, but we're changed and different, and that's ok. We're, dare I say, content?
Just want you to know that you are seen and heard. You are describing deep grief. And you are not alone. You are trying to survive intense pain the best you can. Sending some kindhess, hope and strength your way.
I don’t know why some of us have to carry what feels like more than one persons share of loss and grief. And fuck the ‘it builds strength or character’ trope. No one needs that much strength or character. It’s all just too fucking much.
All I know is I see you, friend. And you are beloved. 🤍
You, too, friend. You, too. <3
I know I should stop being surprised how you somehow make the hardest topics so humanly beautifully to read that I just want to crawl inside your words and never stop reading.
For over a decade you continually make me feel in awe of your way with words that come from such a tender, vulnerable, real place that I think we forget how lucky we are that we get to read them.
I have been in your life for all the moves. In fact, I don’t update your address in my contacts so I have most of the old addresses. It makes me so sad that you have to pack up and move again - and the way you packed the most precious pieces of your life made me cry.
But what really got me was to see myself on your list of favorites. I don’t know how I got so lucky to have that honorable place but somedays when I am so sad about the state of the world, I think about you and Julie and the pups, and I smile - and I think, “But they are my friends…and if I called them and said, ‘I’m coming!!! They would say, ‘Here is our address! We’ll send out a beacon because we know you have a little trouble with directions’” - and you’d be waiting with open arms. 🩵
I love you.
That's precisely how it would happen, Rachel. We'd send a beacon so bright, you'd never get lost. Or I'd just drive your way and lead you. <3 And, of course, you're on my list of favorites. You've been there since Day One. The best people get elevated immediately, and you are simply The Best. XO, Me
I despise moving. And I quit therapy (after years) because it felt like ripping the scab off a wound again and again. I feel the ache in this. No one's spared, but like Kate said, I think some people feel it a lot deeper. I think you're one of those people. (I am, too.) And the fact that you have a joy plan for 2026 is amazing. It's hope. One little bit of happiness at a time. Wishing you all the good things... x
Ripping off the scab again and again -- I get that, Wendy. I feel like I KNOW what I need to do to move forward, but I just don't DO it. I'm going to refer to my 2026 plans as my "Joy Plan" from now on. Thank you for giving it a name. <3
I need a joy plan, too. Doing it IS harder than knowing it. The sadness (and need for comfort) takes priority.
Aww Katrina
Moving can be so hard. I’ve done enough of it in my days and each time I feel like it it’s an opportunity to purge.
I wish you the best in this transition and for the holidays
💗
It's amazing how much "stuff" I have after purging 10 times. Wishing you the happiest of holidays, Prajna. <3
I moved four times in the last year. I feel your pain, I also lost my mom last Thanksgiving. I did give myself that year to grieve, let the tears just flow as hard and fast as they want to come, every time they want to come. I’m now in a place where I think I can feel happy, as my place and surroundings matter so much to me. Fill your new place with everything that you love, including those special momento’s, make it a happy place. Wishing you comfort and peace in the new year.💕❤️
Ooof. Four times in one year is three times too many. I'm so sorry about your Mom. Wishing you continued healing and peace as well. <3
Yes, condolences on your mom also. Two of those moves were two weeks apart. I spent three nights in the new place and knew I had to get out, was in a hotel for a week while I Looked for a new place and started repacking AGAIN. All worth it to be where I am 🙏🏻💕
Encouraged to know you are breathing. Flooded with thoughts, untethered, sad and paralyzed. Sweet memories and a litany of missing. Reel it in to now, Breathe. Stretch. Pack. Stretch. Walk your dog. Write. Cry as needed. Eat food that serves your body instead well. Repeat.
So much good, treasured advice, Michele. A bounty. Thank you so much. 💙
Sending you love and light, if words work <3
If words don’t work, we’re all in trouble, friend. I’ll take them. 💙
We kind of skip the holidays. We try to celebrate them as a season, like a pagan seasonal celebration of the cold, the fire, the dark, the light. Because there is nothing sadder than an empty stocking. We are ok about 5 years after the death. We'll never be whole again, but we're changed and different, and that's ok. We're, dare I say, content?
Blech. I’m sorry you have to move again, and you’re feeling the weight of this season so keenly. I hope 2026 brings a wealth of rest and fun.
Wishing you the same for 2026, sweet Mary. <3
Hearing your heart, Katrina. Honoring that this is a lot. Huge inhales, exhales, and pauses in the midst. 💜🪶
Lot of love to you, Joanie. Thank you for always being here. <3
Just want you to know that you are seen and heard. You are describing deep grief. And you are not alone. You are trying to survive intense pain the best you can. Sending some kindhess, hope and strength your way.
Thank you so much, Wendy. Wishing you peace and joy throughout the holidays. <3