Katrina, this was a very compelling story from your memoir, right? (With names changed.) People have no business throwing their hate and judgements toward you. Or toward anyone. The world needs so so much healing right now. Thank you for sharing your story, and once again, it's truly a story for everyone. ❤️
This piece was beautifully written - gut-wrenchingly honest. I love the fact that this revelation happened to you on the equipment called the reformer. I find that very poignant.
I’d say the trolls are mostly closeted gay men, but I don’t want to insult gay men. What they are though are truly miserable people. If they were happy and well-adjusted, they wouldn’t use their time or energy spewing hate (with typos), especially the ones who comment more than once. In the words of Mr. T.: “I pity the fool.”
P.S. my brother and his wife are amicably separating after a series of hurts on both sides. They have two teenagers. Are they “destroying a family”? Abso-fucking-lutely NOT. They will always be a family. They will both always be there for the kids. What can be better than that? Certainly not witnessing two people who aren’t happy or connecting anymore. That’s not good “glue” for a family.
Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement, Amy. I, too, love the "reformer." It's something, isn't it? I'm shocked at the number of people who take the time and make the effort to just be mean. The article had nothing to do with my looks, but multiple people had to make sure I knew I was ugly? Oy. Anyway, thanks for all the positive vibes, friend. XOXO
Ad hominem attacks are the easiest ones to roll your eyes at because it’s a second grade playground “skillset.” These assholes call even the most beautiful who walk among us “ugly” and “unfuckable” (as if we should be so crestfallen that these emotionally stunted men-children don’t want to have sex with us).
If you haven’t already seen this, it’s worth a look. A little triggering, but entirely relevant:
I hadn't read Aubrey's article until now. Holy shit. Yesterday was such an odd, unnerving day for me, full of highs and lows. I can't imagine what it's like to live that every day.
That was a beautiful article Katrina. So much truth and honesty which so many people obviously can’t handle. I can’t believe those awful comments. All I can say is hugs to you and to thank you for sharing your journey. ❤️
Thank you for your article and congrats on the big space!. It's tough to reveal yourself... let alone on the national stage and with a topic that is so raw and real. Your path was not easy, it was not frictionless and it was heartbreaking many times over and thank you for sharing.
It doesn't matter who you are or what path you have walked, the trolls will find you and find fault with you. It seems they can't help themselves. Just imagine what it is like to be them shrouded in their narrow righteousness. That said, their crude commentary all seems to suggest that you had some other option than to be fully who you are. I suppose some do choose not to be fully themselves..... and also to spend time trolling those who have the courage to live loud and proud.
Thanks, my friend. The comments that crack me up the most are the ones about having made a "split decision" to ruin lives... as if my ex and I didn't agonize over it for years. Literally. But you're right, I think about how sad and small-minded they must be to be able to make such sweeping judgments about another life. Anyway, I miss seeing your face and hope you're both doing well. XO (Also, I still have Kate's crutches. I'm the worst. THAT'S what I should be trolled about!!)
I read your article in the middle of the night. I’m a strong supporter of “things happen for a reason.” I, too, am a late bloomer when it comes to coming out as a lesbian. Even though I have members in my family who are gay, it never occurred to me that I was.
I was 65. Married late in life to a wonderful man but no kids. He passed in 2014. And it was a spark within my belly disengaging from a hug that changed my life.
I remember the moment when I thought, “Wow. I guess this is where I’m going now.” I remember the surrender. It was a sweet moment.
Thank you for sharing your story. It really does help to see yourself in someone else a little bit.
"The surrender." Yes. It's such a surrender to finally understand and accept. Thank you for sharing your story, too. I love to hear from others who have been through the same thing. XO
This is a beautifully-written, authentic piece. I’m impressed by your (ex-)husband’s support of you discovering your true identity, and the way you both navigated the transition (I don’t know much about open marriages, but I’m not surprised it got messy).
Why are so many right-wing trolls reading HuffPost?! Just for the joy of “owning the libs”? I’m sorry you’ve gotten so many rude and judgmental comments. As they say, consider the source. I had my own run-in with a couple of these folks on my Substack, and here’s my response:
Thanks, Liz. My ex was supportive up to a certain point, but things got dark as things often do during divorces. I wish it would have ended differently. Anyway, I read your troll comments, and it hit right in the heart. It's amazing that people think they know you and have the right to be so utterly cruel during what was, I'm sure, an agonizing time in your life.
My article has definitely generated lots of activity on my social media. I'm sure HuffPost would have let me link to my Substack in my bio, but I didn't even think of it until you mentioned it!!! I'm the worst self-marketer in the world!!
What a treat it was to read your essay. It resonated deeply, particularly the "this is who you are" line. I had my own "this is who I am" moment and it's one of the most treasured experiences of my life.
Ignore the trolls. Your work matters. I am proud to be in community with you 🏳️🌈
Your article was beautiful! F*ck those trolls! They're just mad because they don't understand themselves or love. Their hearts have been corrupted.
Big love to you! I'm so happy for you!!
Thank you so much, sweet friend! XO
Sending you so much love Katrina!
Katrina, this was a very compelling story from your memoir, right? (With names changed.) People have no business throwing their hate and judgements toward you. Or toward anyone. The world needs so so much healing right now. Thank you for sharing your story, and once again, it's truly a story for everyone. ❤️
It’s a companion piece for my memoir. Thank you!
Congratulations, Katrina!
Thanks so much, Brooke! ❤️
This piece was beautifully written - gut-wrenchingly honest. I love the fact that this revelation happened to you on the equipment called the reformer. I find that very poignant.
I’d say the trolls are mostly closeted gay men, but I don’t want to insult gay men. What they are though are truly miserable people. If they were happy and well-adjusted, they wouldn’t use their time or energy spewing hate (with typos), especially the ones who comment more than once. In the words of Mr. T.: “I pity the fool.”
xoxo, my friend. Can’t wait for your memoir.
P.S. my brother and his wife are amicably separating after a series of hurts on both sides. They have two teenagers. Are they “destroying a family”? Abso-fucking-lutely NOT. They will always be a family. They will both always be there for the kids. What can be better than that? Certainly not witnessing two people who aren’t happy or connecting anymore. That’s not good “glue” for a family.
Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement, Amy. I, too, love the "reformer." It's something, isn't it? I'm shocked at the number of people who take the time and make the effort to just be mean. The article had nothing to do with my looks, but multiple people had to make sure I knew I was ugly? Oy. Anyway, thanks for all the positive vibes, friend. XOXO
Ad hominem attacks are the easiest ones to roll your eyes at because it’s a second grade playground “skillset.” These assholes call even the most beautiful who walk among us “ugly” and “unfuckable” (as if we should be so crestfallen that these emotionally stunted men-children don’t want to have sex with us).
If you haven’t already seen this, it’s worth a look. A little triggering, but entirely relevant:
https://open.substack.com/pub/aubreyhirsch/p/thats-how-it-works-when-youre-a-woman?r=o3zsi&utm_medium=ios
I hadn't read Aubrey's article until now. Holy shit. Yesterday was such an odd, unnerving day for me, full of highs and lows. I can't imagine what it's like to live that every day.
I applaud your bravery! 😇
Thank you, Cristy! :)
That was a beautiful article Katrina. So much truth and honesty which so many people obviously can’t handle. I can’t believe those awful comments. All I can say is hugs to you and to thank you for sharing your journey. ❤️
Thank you so much, Allyssa! <3
Thank you for your article and congrats on the big space!. It's tough to reveal yourself... let alone on the national stage and with a topic that is so raw and real. Your path was not easy, it was not frictionless and it was heartbreaking many times over and thank you for sharing.
It doesn't matter who you are or what path you have walked, the trolls will find you and find fault with you. It seems they can't help themselves. Just imagine what it is like to be them shrouded in their narrow righteousness. That said, their crude commentary all seems to suggest that you had some other option than to be fully who you are. I suppose some do choose not to be fully themselves..... and also to spend time trolling those who have the courage to live loud and proud.
Thanks, my friend. The comments that crack me up the most are the ones about having made a "split decision" to ruin lives... as if my ex and I didn't agonize over it for years. Literally. But you're right, I think about how sad and small-minded they must be to be able to make such sweeping judgments about another life. Anyway, I miss seeing your face and hope you're both doing well. XO (Also, I still have Kate's crutches. I'm the worst. THAT'S what I should be trolled about!!)
I read your article in the middle of the night. I’m a strong supporter of “things happen for a reason.” I, too, am a late bloomer when it comes to coming out as a lesbian. Even though I have members in my family who are gay, it never occurred to me that I was.
I was 65. Married late in life to a wonderful man but no kids. He passed in 2014. And it was a spark within my belly disengaging from a hug that changed my life.
I remember the moment when I thought, “Wow. I guess this is where I’m going now.” I remember the surrender. It was a sweet moment.
Thank you for sharing your story. It really does help to see yourself in someone else a little bit.
"The surrender." Yes. It's such a surrender to finally understand and accept. Thank you for sharing your story, too. I love to hear from others who have been through the same thing. XO
This is a beautifully-written, authentic piece. I’m impressed by your (ex-)husband’s support of you discovering your true identity, and the way you both navigated the transition (I don’t know much about open marriages, but I’m not surprised it got messy).
Why are so many right-wing trolls reading HuffPost?! Just for the joy of “owning the libs”? I’m sorry you’ve gotten so many rude and judgmental comments. As they say, consider the source. I had my own run-in with a couple of these folks on my Substack, and here’s my response:
www.lizexplores.com/p/maybe-i-shouldnt-have-kids
I’m curious if publishing articles like this has helped grow your audience? Does HuffPost allow you to link to your Substack?
Thanks, Liz. My ex was supportive up to a certain point, but things got dark as things often do during divorces. I wish it would have ended differently. Anyway, I read your troll comments, and it hit right in the heart. It's amazing that people think they know you and have the right to be so utterly cruel during what was, I'm sure, an agonizing time in your life.
My article has definitely generated lots of activity on my social media. I'm sure HuffPost would have let me link to my Substack in my bio, but I didn't even think of it until you mentioned it!!! I'm the worst self-marketer in the world!!
What a treat it was to read your essay. It resonated deeply, particularly the "this is who you are" line. I had my own "this is who I am" moment and it's one of the most treasured experiences of my life.
Ignore the trolls. Your work matters. I am proud to be in community with you 🏳️🌈
Thank you so much for the kind words of affirmation, Clare. I'm happy to hear my essay resonated with you. XO